A childhood accident left Emmaline vulnerable to disturbing fugue states that last only minutes, but feel like an eternity. The blackouts are unsettling but manageable…until she meets Johnny Dellasandro.
The reclusive painter gained notoriety in the ’70s for his debauched lifestyle and raunchy art films. His naked body has achieved cult status, especially in Emm’s mind– she’s obsessed with the man, who’s grown even sexier with age. Today Johnny shuns the spotlight and Emm in particular…until she falls into a fugue on his doorstep.
In that moment she’s transported back thirty years, crashing a party at Johnny’s place in his wild-man heyday — the night is a blur of flesh and heat that lingers on her skin long after she’s woken to the present.
It happens again and again, each time-slip another mind-blowing orgy, and soon Emm can’t stop, though every episode leaves her weaker and weaker. She’s frightened by what’s happening to her, but she’s even more terrified of losing this portal to the Johnny she wants so badly. The one who wants her, too, and takes her — every chance he gets.
At the age of 32 Emm has finally moved out of her parents house. With her above mentioned fugue states she's never been able to be on her own. At the beginning of the book she's been fugue-free for 2 years. She's made some friends and hangs out at a local coffee shop.
One day at the shop while talking to a friend she sees Johnny Dellasandro. Being the relatively sheltered woman that she is she has no idea about the independent films that Johnny made in the 70's and the artist that he has become but her best friend quickly fills her in. Emm gets a tad bit obsessed with finding out more information about Johnny and even begins to have fugues where together they play the main characters in her hallucinations, with Johnny playing himself – but his 1970's self that is.
Time after time Emm finds herself having fugues and returning in her head to the 70's and to Johnny where they have a fun and extremely passionate relationship. In real life though she finds Johnny more than disconcerting as he constantly is standoffish. Eventually the man caves to her charm and Emm and the “now” Johnny become an item. But how can Emm tell this man that she's falling in love with that she's having the hallucinations with his much younger self? And really, are the hallucinations just that or are they truly happening?
I don't know if you've ever read a Megan Hart book before, and this may not happen to you, but when I pick one up I have an extremely hard time putting it down. It sucks me in and I just have to read until I finish it! I had to put it down after the first 50 pages because of a previous (really fun) obligation but when I picked it back up I couldn't put it down until I was done. Not only that but I find her books so compelling that I find myself thinking about them long after I've closed the book or shut down the ereader. This book was no different. Very powerful and very thought provoking in so many different ways.
In this story I felt so strongly for Emm for a variety of reasons. She's so happy to be on her own and have friends and be independent but she finds herself lonely at times as well. My heart hurt for her a little bit when Johnny-now was off-putting and shutting doors in her face and she was confused about why it hurt her so much for him to do so. She was also so confused about the fugues hallucinations and exactly what they meant. I wanted so badly for her to spill the beans to the Johnny-now about what was happening but it was such a better story for the anticipation I had because of the waiting.
Johnny. Wow. Johnny, both in the here and now and in the 70's was just one incredibly luscious man. His 70's persona was so laid back and free and easy with many smiles and the attitude of peace he portrayed. The Johnny-now was much more uptight at first but we saw him thaw and loosen up over the course of the book. He was also older – he's 25 years older than Emm – and therefore a bit wiser than his 70's self and I loved seeing both sides of him.
The book is not as intense as some Hart stories but no less potent. It's a story of love, loss, hope and renewal and I very much recommend it.
Rating: 4.25 out of 5
2nd Annual Digital-First Read-a-Thon coming soon! #DFRaT
58 minutes ago